Dear Men


Trigger warning: mention of rape and suicide.

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression. This statement is so true for many men. They feel threatened by gender equality. For that reason, they have this hatred for feminism. However, feminism is more than just gender equality for women. Feminism fights for the rights of everyone, around the world. Essentially, feminism looks to create social equality, regardless of gender, colour and class.

If you broke down feminism, point by point, most men would agree with everything that is being said. Once it’s all put together and the word “FEMINISM” is slapped on the package, all of sudden it is hated. Why? Don’t let your toxic masculinity distract you because of a word. Every movement needs a strong name to clearly identify the objective. For three centuries, this word has provided so many changes that has improved the lives of billions of people around the world.

Feminism has helped your mothers, sisters, wives and daughters in many different ways. From the right to vote, to the fight for equal pay, women around the world have seen their lives improve. We are now seeing women in political positions. Women who know exactly what your female family members are going through. Effects of feminism aren’t just felt in western countries. Education for girls has become the norm in countries where it was impossible for girls to go to school, until recently. Feminism has help people of the LGBT+ community to be the people who they are. The treatment of women is constantly changing and improving. These are just a small number of changes that have occurred. There have been hundreds of different ways feminism has improved the lives of your loved ones. Surely they are enough motivation for you to support feminism?

If you really need more reasons as to why feminism is great and why we all need it in our lives, then just look at the positive effect it has had on the lives of men.

Lets start with the equality in pay. Paying workers equally for their work, regardless of their gender, is just social equality. The pay gap between men and women is clearly a problem. Also, the pay gap is also a problem with minorities. People from BAME are constantly being underpaid. Who is fighting for these people? The answer is feminists. Of course, there are activists and charities out there who are also fighting for this cause. However, feminists have been doing this for a long time. By reducing the pay gap, it helps everyone. Minorities, people from low socio-economic backgrounds and women will all be paid what they deserve. Everyone will be paid for their work and not what they look like or what their social background is.

For me, the biggest improvement feminism has made in the lives of men is that now men are more involved in the lives of their children. By taking away the old age attitude of men working, women staying at home, it has allowed women to have the freedom of having a career and having children, and has also allowed men to be in their children’s lives. Whether it is being at school plays, or cooking food, that bond between the father and child only improves. No longer do men feel the need to work long hours to provide for their family, whilst being out of touch with their children’s lives. All this is only possible because of how feminism has changed the way society works. New laws and new ways of thinking has helped both mothers and fathers.

Trigger warning: suicide mention. A major problem amongst men is how we handle mental and physical health problems. The statistics clearly show the scale of the problem. Women are more likely to suffer from depression; however, men are three times more likely to commit suicide. Men aged 45 and 49 have the highest rate of suicide. The rate of suicide in men under 25 increased by 23.7% last year. On top of mental health, men are less likely to go see a doctor for their physical health. Even with the improvement of health care, life expectancy of men is constantly way down compared to women. However, there is hope. Countries with high gender equality have higher life expectancy figures for both men and women, with the differences being very small. Feminism tackles these traditional ways of thinking. It is clear that by opening up and talking about your feelings, your life improves significantly. Asking for help works. To actually tackle these problems amongst men’s health, feminist ideas are the way forward.

Trigger warning: rape mention. One thing I have noticed is people constantly claiming rape allegations are false. Did you know men are more likely to be raped than be falsely accused of rape? Men are 230 times more likely to be raped than be falsely accused. Next time you claim an allegation is false, then just think about that. Instead, why don’t you actually use the opportunity to support rape victims, especially men, who are constantly forgotten and never given a voice? False allegations make up of 0.62% of all cases. So, the next time you do say “it’s probably fake”, you’re probably defending a rapist. You’re most definitely accusing a rape victim of lying. 

The Me Too movement has done so much for survivors. They can now get some kind of justice for the terrible thing that have happened to them. However, the support that victims are receiving seems one sided. It is coming from women and not enough men. If you have done nothing wrong then you don’t need to worry. Instead, you can help men who have gone through something terrible. If all men are there to support survivors, it will become easier for them to come forward and get the same kind of justice they deserve. 

These are just a small number of examples of how feminism helps men. There are countless number of examples. At the end of the day, if you truly care about yourself, your family, friends and those around you, then you should support feminism. As women’s lives improve, so does yours. Not only will you live longer, but you’ll live happier. You will have more support for you during the best and worst of times. You have already felt the force of feminism, and really it has only been positive. More can still be achieved. Society can reach a state of equality and it will happen with or without you. Put your privilege aside for social equality.

Aleha